SocRogueScholars

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Miss Fortunes


7408506410_c1ed04a0d0_oBy Matthew Chase

Published May 21, 2015

Getting life for murder ain’t no irony

Not to this child of Miss Fortunes, you see

From that little island town, raised by a village

My father appeared missing

Thought he’d make it big, but only ended up criminalized

Traveling dead-end roads, lies and greed track the mileage

Sellin’ things that make mind, body, and soul obscene

My mother the caring enabler, bitten with the spirits.

I was taught the ways, if you know what I mean

Through demonstration and conversation

Live my life where the grass only gets shadier.

Left alone, take up the only trade I’d ever known

In the game of confidence, I gotta get meaner

In a world that doesn’t give a care for me

Be like the old man, I’d sworn I’d never be.

I’d prove myself not a loser, but a king

My self-esteem invested in the extreme

Women, my objects, my playthings

Men, my dupes ‘n’ hazards

Break ’em hard like a bad habit.

Even killed a man, no regrets said

Ain’t like the candy ass I snapped in two

Just like my mind on the mend

Another nail to the casket.

images-1Locked up in a world made

Concrete tears, barbwired fears

My heart and mind

Confined to six-by-eight solitary.

As the lifetimes drain and fade away, so does my adrenaline

Running crews with ease, but never getting along any easier.

Living with myself, too little, too late

My walls come crashing, fences detracting

Fell victim to intervention and introspection.

And with my return to the free world

Never quite feeling free in my probation

Still waiting to be barked and told, completely paralyzed

And I wonder if I’m still human

Or am I just a two-bit disguise,

Still just a brick in the prison wall.invisible_spy_is_invisible_by_xnighttheassassinx-d5ehou6

I, Mr. Liar now misguided, lost cause

Am I a shadow of the man

I once conned myself into believing I was?

So here I am, for all I’ve done

Still playing games of confidence

But with a different intent in mind.

Hope to give hope to others like me where I had none

Lives broken and splitting at the rotten rind

Making ends meet, struggling to survive.

Their lives just like mine

Constant reminder to what I might’ve been

Had I still been alive.

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One thought on “Miss Fortunes

  1. This is a powerful message and well written! So many of us have a family member who has or still is struggling with these issues. The poem is moving and making me stop and think about the different lives and struggles each individual may be going through.

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